Shoulder Holders
Speaking of fireworks, let’s talk about the various special events at a Disney theme park. The parades, outdoor shows, and fireworks are heavily attended events. Guests arrive early in order to find the perfect spot to catch the show. That level of preparedness falls apart when a parent – or even worse, someone on a date – boosts someone up on their shoulders.
Suddenly, you’re staring at a kid’s legs or someone who looks like they’re practicing to become the chicken fighting champions of their pool. It’s beyond aggravating. More importantly, it’s disrespectful. If you want someone else in your party to have a better view, take the time to verify that you won’t block anybody else’s view. If you will, move somewhere else. It’s the decent thing to do.
Epcot Drunks
Image: DisneyLook, my best guess is that 70 percent of foot traffic at the World Showcase at night depends on alcohol. Without a few potent potables, nobody’s going to hang around the Morocco Pavilion to admire the tapestries (which is regrettable, but that’s an argument for another day).
Theme park tourists go to the World Showcase to drink. That’s been the case since 1982, and it’s never going to change. We’re all fine with it, too! Even teetotalers admire the back of the park for its constant energy and bustling (early) nightlife. We all want the party to keep going until the park closes…and then a few hours after that.
Just, you know, have some limits. When your binge drinking requires Disney employees to shout, “Code V!,” you should have stopped at least two rounds ago. Don’t be that guy. Know your limits and maybe get a breathalyzer app for your phone. And speaking of phones…
Zombie Phone Users
Image via Flickr user Mike Miley
Image: Flickr (license)
What’s the rallying cry of older theme park tourists at Disney? “Put down your phones!” Now, Disney clearly disagrees with this notion, at least to an extent. Otherwise, they wouldn’t have built the My Disney Experience app to take care of so many park-related issues like Advanced Dining Reservations and FastPass selections. That’s still no excuse for the sheer volume of people who wander aimlessly, staring at their phones rather than the oncoming traffic. Stroller Maniacs, why aren’t you targeting Zombie Phone Users instead of innocent people?
Look, my wife plays Pokemon. I’m not judging here. I understand that Magikarps aren’t readily available in landlocked area. When you’re at a Disney theme park, you have a rare chance to catch them all. And lots of other phone apps and games pass the time during a long line. Phones are a part of our culture today. They let bored individuals browse the internet or text friends. It sounds great until phone users start causing traffic pileups.
You know the incidents I mean. A Zombie Phone User walks haphazardly, accidentally bumping into someone holding food. Suddenly, the Happiest Place on Earth has sticky drinks all over the ground, and everyone’s cranky about the cause. The situation causes moods to spiral downward, unintentionally leading to a couple of the temper tantrums mentioned above. And it’s all so avoidable. Only use your phone when you’re standing relatively still. The Pokemon will still be there for you to catch!
Zombie Phone Users are the worst problem at Disney theme parks right now.
Comments
You forgot one. The Line Stretcher, these are the people that make the line longer by not closing up the space in front. The appropriate space is one that lets the rare breeze or other moving air to flow through.