Ponchos

Image: mjhagen, Flickr (license)

The Walt Disney World poncho is the official souvenir of the unprepared. It is simultaneously a badge of honor and a mark of shame. It is a piece of vinyl shaped to fit over a person’s head and torso, which ordinarily would be valued at about 50 cents.

Ah, but not this piece of vinyl, for it has Mickey Mouse proudly emblazoned across the back. For that reason, it’s roughly $9.

And yet, when you see the sea of Disney ponchos unfurl itself across the pathways of Walt Disney World during a rain shower, it’s hard not to feel a bit jealous. Everyone else is wearing the same thing — clearly that is the trend du jour. Sure, you could wear your dollar-store trash bag, but then are you really en vogue?

Disney’s ponchos are a ripoff not just for the price, and not even because it’s the only option available when a downpour starts. No, they’re a ripoff because even though you know they aren’t worth the price, you’re still happier with one of those than with a clear sheet of plastic you picked up at the gas station. 

Parking

Image: joeshlabotnik, Flickr (license)

Paying for parking has become such an engrained part of the theme park experience that we don’t really bat an eyelash at it anymore. But if you really stop to think about it, it’s a patently absurd exercise that is deeply cynical and cruel.

Parking, usually, only costs money when space is at a premium. In cities, for example, it can be hard to find somewhere to park your car. And so rather than fighting to find a spot on the street, some people choose to pay a large fee in order to have a guaranteed spot. Even parking at sporting events can cost money, but only because sports venues tend to be in densely populated areas with similar parking woes.

But every single person driving into the Walt Disney World Resort property is doing so with the intention of visiting the Disney parks. Space isn’t at a premium, because there’s only one show in town. No one is parking at the Magic Kingdom to then spend their day putting around Orlando.

Parking at Walt Disney World is, essentially, a shadow attendance tax that’s added onto your admission price (unless you take Uber/Lyft/A Resort Shuttle or stay on property.