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The Little Mermaid, live show, Walt Disney World

Disney’s brilliance is an unrivaled blessing in a world which yearns for exceptional entertainment, escape and distraction. The entire Disney cast is so good at what they do, they sometimes fall prey to their own talents and success. When something isn’t entirely perfect it elicits a disproportionate reaction from even their adoring public, as we have come to expect, however unreasonable, infallibility.

Disney Parks attractions receive a level of scrutiny we should, but do not even apply to those with whom we pledge to live the rest of our lives. A ride may have trilled visitors for decades; may have, in its way, contributed to the raising of your children. Change one thing about the queue that does not meet with universal satisfaction, though, and it’s as if Disney has perpetrated an intentional betrayal.

Disneyland, Fantasyland, Sword in the Stone

Guests of Disney Resorts are invited to expect perfection. As mentioned, it is inherent in the phenomenal and wholly dependable experience that only Disney can deliver. Still, you may want to save the indignation when some minor event occurs to your disliking. Redirect it toward an actual Disney oversight, i.e., changes that are way overdue. A number of rides could benefit from a wholesale renovation, if not outright removal. These truly warrant your irrational scorn.

Editor's Note: Christopher's opinions in no way reflect those of Theme Park Tourist or its staff. 

1. Finding Nemo Submarine Voyage, Disneyland

Finding Nemo Submarine Voyage, Disneyland

It’s a charming twist on an absolute classic attraction, and a fine tribute to an excellent Disney movie. Simply being charming and merely being fine do not fill the queues at Disneyland, or any of the exceedingly popular, and thus highly scrutinized parks. Given the prime real estate it occupies, between the Matterhorn and Tomorrowland, and the amount of space it consumes, the attraction herein needs to be spectacular. It isn’t.

It’s a nice break from the heat, though the close quarters are akin to swapping one discomfort for another. The novelty of the Nemo remodel has also worn off, as guests find what looks like the simple addition of a few projection screens beneath Disney’s typical genius, and barely worth revisiting.

The solution here would take considerable effort, admittedly, though we’re talking about the company that built Disney California Adventure in a parking lot and turned however many acres of uninhabitable Floridian swamp into Walt Disney World. With the area the Submarine Voyage currently occupies, and the old Motorboat attraction, and throw in the rotating rotunda of boring that is Disneyland’s version of Innoventions, you could create a fairly vast Star Wars Land. We know there’s something like this in the works, but rumors point to putting it in ToonTown. Star Wars Land belongs next to Star Tours and Space Mountain, and could, without remorse, replace what’s there now.

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Comments

Go figure...they took classic rides like Mr. Toad's Wild Ride and 20,000 Leagues Under the Sea and turned them into trendy, absolute crap instead of using a little imagination and pixie dust and giving them a good refresher. I know that Walt would have wanted for the parks to stay up-to-date and relevant, but he also knew that you don't mess with the classics. WDW and DLR were created for kids of ALL ages, not just the 1-12 set. Walt's world wasn't overly consumed with giving every single animated character/movie their own ride. If it didn't seem like a successful concept to him, he didn't go with it. He took great interest in classic books, art, and history, and he tried to bring some of that to his guests through the rides, exhibits, and scenery. Adults love Disney just as much as the kids; and we like to ride and experience some of the Disney classics from our childhood too. Nowadays all the execs at Disney are concerned with is how much profit they can make in the short term off of their latest films. No one seems to care about Walt's vision anymore. Just sad.

In reply to by Rollyn (not verified)

Very point on. It's about how much they can suck out of your bank account because they know the kids will want the souvenirs afterwards.

It seems that all of the newer rides at Magic Kingdom are all "short cuts".....meaning jump on a loose theme of a Disney movie and do the least you can to create a ride. The quality of what is being done now is nothing as stellar as some of the original park rides. The new Fantasy Land expansion is a perfect example and a major disappointment.

In reply to by Ron (not verified)

I couldn't agree more! Fantasyland is a huge disappointment.

In reply to by Ron (not verified)

Another dead on point. What happened to imagination? I know they cut costs but considering how much revenue they bring in, would it be too much to ask to spend some of that into the new attractions and not into stockholders pockets?

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